


Finding Phil Lester

by auroraphilealis (athousandrosepetals)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Blow Jobs, Coming In Pants, Getting Together, Hand Jobs, M/M, Masturbation, porn blog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-29 23:25:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13937673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/athousandrosepetals/pseuds/auroraphilealis
Summary: After running into his best friends porn blog, Dan can’t stop staring at nude photos of Phil. This makes looking Phil in the eye incredibly difficult.





	Finding Phil Lester

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer** : In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.
> 
> While I’ve had this fic in the works for a few months now, it is thanks to @legdabs, @laughter-food-and-sex, and @phanarchy encouraging me to write smut last night that it is finally finished!

When most people stumbled across their best friend’s porn blog, they usually turned around and instantly started teasing said friend. When Dan Howell stumbled across his best friends porn blog… he quietly and nonchalantly bookmarked the page for later viewing.

It was an accident, really. He hadn’t even been looking for anything in particular when he’d picked up Phil’s cell phone and opened the tumblr app to scroll down his dash. In fact, scrolling down Phil’s dash was a commonplace thing, whether on his own phone or Phil’s, so it had hardly seemed to matter at the time; they were _best friends_ after all, and for the longest time, Dan had assumed that they shared everything anyway.

That is, until he’d picked up Phil’s phone and found himself faced with a seemingly endless supply of porn.

Dan had never seen _that_ on Phil’s phone before, so it was undeniably a surprise to him to find that his best friend was apparently logged into the wrong tumblr account… or something.

Maybe “wrong” account wasn’t exactly the right word, considering – well.

Dan hadn’t meant to snoop. He really hadn’t – it was just. Well, Dan was kind of confused. Had Phil’s tumblr been hacked? Or corrupted by some kind of porn bot? He hadn’t known, so he’d just kind of clicked on over to the account tab and seen… more of Phil than he’d ever anticipated seeing - not to say that he didn’t _want_ to see it, considering the whole _bookmarking_ thing, but, you know, it wasn’t exactly something that came up in polite conversation.

In fact, the only reason Dan even _recognized_ the images on Phil’s apparent porn account as _Phil_ was because of the sheer amount of times he’d seen his best friend shirtless.

Having assumed he’d never get the chance to see anything _lower_ , Dan had maybe spent more time than any normal best friend might staring, admiring, and memorizing Phil’s long, bare torso until he could point it out from a line up – which he was kind of technically doing now; there was the little freckle next to Phil’s belly button that Dan was _intensely_ interested in licking, and the cute little curve of his belly moving up towards his ribcage, and the sparse bit of hair on his chest that Dan wanted to curl his fingers in, and the undeniable black hair _just_ showing at his shoulder, under his chin where the image cut off…

Phil. Undeniably Phil, and _quite a bit_ of Phil, too, when Dan allowed his gaze to trail _lower_.

Shit.

Was that?

Yep. Yes. Yes it was.

Nestled within a rather cute bit of nearly red pubic hair sat Phil’s cock; large, thick, and _proud_ , jutting out impossibly hard at the camera. Dan was almost surprised it wasn’t the center of attention for the entire image considering just how glorious it was, red-tipped and particularly inviting, but he was far too distracted _staring_ to really consider the caption below that read: _that full body shot for those who’ve been asking ;)_

By the time his best friend had returned with the popcorn he’d set out to make earlier, Dan had already opened up tumblr on his own phone and entered “amazingporn.tumblr.com” into his bookmarks.

He didn’t say a word to Phil; of course he didn’t. Why would he? If the porn blog was something his best friend had thought to keep secret, well then, Dan would keep his secret. Except not. If Dan hadn’t been desperately attracted to his best friend, he’d probably be taking the piss out of him right now.

Instead, he was keeping the secret knowledge to himself that his best friend apparently posed nude online for his - how many followers had his profile said he had? - about three thousand followers, while simultaneously reblogging and enjoying nude photos of _other men_.

Men.

Dan hadn’t even known that Phil was _gay_. Or bi, or whatever, it didn’t matter - the fact remained that Phil was somehow just as interested in cock as Dan was, and that was a revelation in and of itself.

What had happened to best friends telling each other everything? Forget the fact that Dan had been too embarrassed to tell Phil that he was interested in dick, it hardly seemed right that Phil had neglected to tell Dan that Phil was equally as interested in dick! What was the point of having the status of “best friend” if that didn’t entail sharing each other’s deepest, darkest secrets?

If Dan hadn’t been so afraid of revealing his own desperate attraction to his best friend, he might have confronted Phil about it all right then and there, but as it stood, Dan did not.

Instead, he enjoyed the rest of the movie he and Phil had set about watching after school that afternoon, stayed for dinner with the Lester clan like he always did, and headed home quite a bit later than most teenagers did to climb into bed and go to sleep.

Only Dan didn’t go to sleep; no, instead, he picked up his phone, went on incognito, and pulled up his bookmark for Phil’s porn blog because he had a little bit of… research to do. And if by research, he meant _masturbation_ , well, only he and his hand needed to know that.

It was just… Phil had _so many pictures_ posted of himself. Far more, at least, then Dan had been envisioning he would have. Who would have thought Dan’s somewhat shy and incredibly quirky best friend could be so - so - _hot_. And not just physically, but _verbally_ too; the captions he posted, and the cheeky teasing he engaged in with his followers… it was all just a bit overwhelming for Dan, whose cheeks were flushed and cock was hard a mere few scrolls down Phil’s blog.

It was no wonder his fingers were itching at his waistband already, no wonder his knees were drawn up and his legs spread as he read _are you ready for me, princess? I promise I’ll treat you real well if you spread your legs for me, all warm and pretty_ just under an image of Phil’s cock all hard and red, leaking at the tip with his strong, pale fingers wrapped around the base. It was so _big_ , too, far bigger than Dan had ever imagined, but not overwhelmingly large either. Phil was just really thick, above average in length, and Dan wanted nothing more than to get that thing inside of him _right now_. Dan wished he could catch another glimpse of Phil’s balls as well, though. They were so pretty… Dan had his lip trapped between his teeth as he dipped his fingers into his boxers and teased at the base of his own dick.

He kept scrolling, feeling tense all over, taking in Phil’s dirty talk and the way he posed for his followers, far more confident in his body online than he was in real life.

What had happened to the boy who who wore baggy jeans because the one time he’d borrowed a pair of Dan’s, he’d blushed from head to toe all day long when their classmates wouldn’t stop _staring_? What had happened to the boy who wore nothing but graphic tee’s that did nothing but hang off his lanky body, and hid the way his shoulders looked all broad and perfect when he actually managed to wear something form fitting? What had happened to the boy who wore quirky socks and loved to show them off with that cute little smile he always got where his tongue stuck out and Dan - Dan… Dan just wanted to suck it into his mouth.

He shuddered as his fingers wrapped more properly around his dick and started to stroke, eyes half lidded as he took in an image of Phil fisting his own dick on screen with a hand full of lube. His hand was caught in a downstroke, the head of his cock pushed up and past his foreskin, beautiful and red. Dan wanted to lick it, and his hips kicked into his own palm as he stared.

That’s when he saw it; the video.

So far, Dan had noted that Phil rarely reblogged other people’s porn, not unless he _really_ liked it, and even then, he usually captioned it with something more akin to the dirty talk Dan was never going to get used to seeing. This video, though… this video was most definitely _Phil_ , and Dan could not believe his eyes as he stared at it.

 _Cumshot_ _;)_

And oh, lord, did Dan need to see _this_.

The fingers of his right hand were shaking as he clicked play, headphones firmly pressed into his ears. Finally, _finally_ , Dan was going to get to hear what Phil sounded like when he pleasured himself, and he was admittedly green with envy that apparently _thousand’s_ of other people had gotten to hear it before him, but he was too turned on to focus on that right now. Instead, all he wanted was to _watch_.

So he did, his fingers tight around his cock as Phil’s video began to play. Those long pale fingers Dan was so familiar with were there, staring out the video playing along the thick vein on the underside of Phil’s cock, just kind of teasing along it, and it was _pulsing_. Phil was so clearly already close to orgasm. Whatever he’d chopped this video from, Dan wanted to see _more_. He wanted to know how Phil got himself all worked up, how he got _started_ , but for now, this would do.

Maybe there were more videos, maybe there were longer ones…

Fuck, _fuck_.

Phil _grunted_ , the sound husky and warm as it surged through Dan’s headphones, shocking him back into paying attention to what was on the screen in front of him rather than his own lackluster imagination. Dan licked his lips; Phil was stroking himself, his fingers pulling on his foreskin, dragging it up and down his cock until it was swallowing up the head of it over and over again. Those long, delicate fingers were so beautiful wrapped around Phil’s girth. The image was so fucking _satisfying_.

And the _sounds_.

Phil was quiet, something that wasn’t much of a surprise to Dan at all, but he wasn’t _that_ quiet. He made noise; these pretty little breathy sounds that verged on grunts, and then, when it got too much for him, he _did_ grunt, and oh, the amount of information Dan was getting from a two minute video was… was…

Enough wank material for a _year_ surely, not that he’d need it now that he’d discovered an entire blog full of porn all based around _Phil_.

Phil’s fingers worked himself faster. Dan could see his cock twitching in his hold, could see Phil’s thighs trembling just within shot of the camera that was focused on Phil’s cock and tummy, which Phil had sucked in as he tried to regulate his breathing.

That was the moment Dan realized he was about to witness Phil _orgasm_ , and his own cock twitched so violently in his hand that Dan gasped, moaned, and felt his eyes slip closed as he came, hot and hard inside of his pajama bottoms and into the palm of his hand.

There was the sound of hitched breathing through the headphones, and then a long, low, keen before the video ended.

Dan was too busy panting and coming down from his own orgasm to hate himself for missing the infamous _cumshot_.

He’d just have to watch the video again later, maybe when he wasn’t so desperate for release that he came prematurely after he’d hardly touched himself at all. The idea of seeing Phil’s body as it shook with orgasm, cum splattering all over his fingers and oozing from that beautiful tip…

Dan shuddered again, and stifled another whimper against the back of his hand. His chest was heaving with the effort of holding back the majority of his noises as he clicked off the power button on his phone and dropped it on the duvet beside him.

His legs were shaking as he climbed out of bed and headed for the bathroom to clean himself up. All he really wanted now, head fuzzy with the pleasure he’d just given himself, was to go back to bed and sleep for ten years.

**

Needless to say, facing Phil at school the next day was… interesting, to say the least.

Dan couldn’t even look at him without blushing, which resulted in the careful avoidance of Phil’s gaze all together. It was probably the most uncomfortable Dan had been around Phil in years, and they’d been best friends since childhood. He hadn’t quite expected to feel so guilty the next morning, and yet he undeniably was.

He’d masturbated to thoughts of his best friend before, sure, but that was different to masturbating to pictures and videos that he hadn’t been meant to see. That was different from holding onto this secret that he knew his best friend posed naked online, and got himself off for his thousands of followers to see.

This felt like an entirely new level of _not okay_ , and yet Dan couldn’t seem to make himself stop.

For the next week, he avoided Phil’s gaze when they hung out, and he went home every night to get off on Phil’s blog, shoving one hand into his mouth to block the sounds of his moans as his fingers rubbed tight over his cock and tugged at his foreskin to keep himself going.

Masturbating had never been so easy. Aided by the way Phil’s cock looked engulfed by his hand, or teased with vibrators and magic wands, the sounds of his best friends breathy voice when he worked himself up, or, god forbid, just before he _came_ , were all that Dan had ever needed, and he found himself spilling his own seed over his fist far faster than he ever had before. Sat curled up on his bed at three am with his phone so perfectly poised over his face, Dan spent far too many nights trying to memorize the look of Phil’s cock, his smooth, pale thighs, and his ass that one time he actually pressed his fingers inside on camera for the world to see.

By the time a week had passed, Dan knew Phil’s dick almost as well as he knew his own _hand_ , could picture it perfectly in his mind, and on more than one occasion, had been caught by Phil flat out _staring_ at his crotch.

“What’s gotten into you lately?” Phil asked around the fourth time, cheeks a very, very pleasant red that matched the shade of Phil’s cock just before he came. He turned his body away from Dan, like he was afraid of what Dan was thinking, and conked him on the head for good measure.

It was enough to knock Dan out of his stupor. He shook his head, blushing himself as he finally, for the first time in what must have been over a week now, looked his best friend in the eye. They were stood in his living room, the rest of Phil’s family at work, or school, and they’d just been about to get a snack from the kitchen when Dan had zoned out again.

“Sorry, I - I’ve just been. I don’t know,” Dan explained lamely, and ducked his head away again. This wasn’t something he particularly wanted to face, if he didn’t absolutely have too. The last thing he needed was Phil finding out that Dan had been getting off to pictures of him, even if Phil _had_ put those exact images up for that purpose. Those were for anonymous viewers like himself, not his _best friend_.

Dan felt like he’d violated Phil on more than one occasion, and yet he just couldn’t seem to make himself stop.

His gaze darted to Phil’s crotch again, and he watched as Phil flinched away from him.

“Knock it off! Why are you staring at my junk all the time lately! It’s weird!” Phil complained, his voice doing that high pitched thing it always did when he was particularly uncomfortable. It made a pit open up in Dan’s stomach, and his mouth go dry. He nearly wanted to cry at the idea of making Phil, sweet, shy Phil, of all people, uncomfortable.

“I - I’m sorry, I just - it’s -” Dan said, fumbling over the words and unsure how to make this entire situation alright again. How did you explain away staring at your best friends bulge, of all things? It just wasn’t done.

So, Dan did the only thing he could think to do, and blurted out, “I think I might be gay!”

Instantly, he regretted the words. Wasn’t there a reason he’d never spoken them aloud before? Wasn’t there a reason he hadn’t felt comfortable sharing that fact with anyone, let alone Phil, the very reason he’d recognized his sexuality in the first place?

Even if Phil _was_ gay, or bi, or whatever, that didn’t necessarily mean he was going to be any less uncomfortable with the fact that Dan was staring at his dick for the exact same reason! It was already quite clear he was made uncomfortable by the action. Who knew what Phil had been thinking! The wild theories swirling around in his head… Dan couldn’t even began to imagine them. What if the idea of Dan having a crush on Phil was abhorrent to his best friend?

Biting his bottom lip, Dan stared up at Phil with with wide eyes. Suddenly, there were butterflies in his stomach, but they weren’t the excited kind. No, these were more like _hornets_.

How could Dan be so stupid? Of course admitting to being gay was the last thing Phil would want to hear after Dan had spent so much time staring at his dick. Who would want someone like Dan falling in love with them? Phil had the entire internet fawning over his junk, he could have anyone he wanted…

Phil wasn’t glaring at him, though. No, Phil was just staring at Dan liked he’d been punched in the face, and Dan wasn’t sure what was worse. Phil seemed to be relaxing, though, and surely _that_ was a good sign? He was no longer angling his body away from Dan’s, and his shoulders had relaxed, despite the startled expression on his face. He seemed to have shrunk in size by a little, as if he’d been holding his breath a second ago and readying for some kind of attack.

But why would Dan ever attack Phil?

Unless - had Phil thought Dan knew about his porn blog, and he’d been tensed for the inevitable fall out?

Suddenly, Dan felt like a massive idiot.

“Oh,” Phil finally replied, his voice soft. “I guess… that’s not what I was expecting,” he admitted. And then, rather suddenly, he was grinning, and a well of hope so sudden filled Dan that he nearly choked on it.

The hornets were definitely more like chainsaws going off inside of him now.

Unexpectedly, Phil reached out and patted Dan gently on the shoulder.

“Thanks for telling me. I know that must have been hard to do. And I guess, if it makes you more comfortable, you can go ahead and stare at my junk?”

Dan’s jaw nearly fell open. Unable to believe what he’d just heard, Dan blinked rapidly a few times in quick succession, and then he started laughing. It was soft, unsure at first, surprised even, and then it turned into a full on bought of healthy laughter. Phil had already been grinning, as if offering for his best friend to stare at his dick was perfectly normal, but at the sound of Dan’s laughter, Phil started to laugh too.

Before Dan knew it, he was holding onto his sides and curling in on himself slightly. Something like relief was pouring through him, despite the fact that none of this was okay. Dan was still terrified that Phil was going to hate him when he realized Dan had a crush on him, let alone the fact that he’d found his porn blog, and yet for the first time in a week Dan felt _okay_.

That this was all going to be okay.

Finally getting a hold of himself and straightening up, Dan shook his head at Phil fondly. “Thanks, Phil. I appreciate the permission.”

This started a whole new round of laughter for Phil, who threw his head back as he let loose. Dan just kind of smiled, but his eyes were trained on the way Phil’s neck looked all stretched out for him. His adam’s apple was fairly prominent, unlike Dan’s, but it wasn’t unattractive. In fact, it was more than just a little bit of a turn on, and Dan could already imagine himself pressing in close to that neck and sucking wild hickies into the too-pale skin.

God, what Phil must taste like, Dan couldn’t help thinking. Unconsciously, he found himself licking his lips, and when he blinked, Phil was staring at him again.

Only this time, there was something like curiosity in his gaze.

“Wh-what?” Dan asked. He wasn’t used to having so much of Phil’s attention on him, especially not now that… well, now that Phil knew he was gay.

“Nothing,” Phil replied easily. If Dan had thought Phil had looked nervous before, he now exuded confidence. In fact, Dan thought he could see Phil straightening up, becoming… the man who posted nude pictures of himself on the internet for strangers to enjoy.

Swallowing thickly, Dan blinked rapidly again, and took a step backward. The motion was apparently a mistake, as Dan found himself crashing backwards into Phil’s sofa, and falling backwards onto the cushions. Somehow, the vulnerability of the movement didn’t make Dan feel any safer. Instead, it made him feel completely _exposed_.

“It’s just,” Phil said, moving forward to follow Dan, seeming unconcerned for the fact that Dan had fallen over. “I’m pretty sure I’m interested in boys and girls,” Phil continued, eyes suddenly taking on a darker look - predatory. Dan’s eyes widened, and he felt his breathing speed up as he realized just what was happening. “So really, I wasn’t so much as giving you permission as… wondering if you’d _like_ to keep looking.”

Dan didn’t know what to say to that. Having Phil turn on him in such a flash hadn’t been part of what Dan had been expecting - if anything he’d anticipated Phil kicking him out, or never returning his affections, his _interest_ , and yet here Phil was, looking like the sex god Dan had seen far too many times already on his blog.

Never his face, though. Never his face.

Just that long, lithe body with the soft curves at his belly, and the thick cock hidden beneath loose trousers. Dan licked his lips all over again just thinking about it.

Realizing too late that Dan was staring at Phil’s dick again, Dan flicked his gaze back upward, and found that Phil was smirking.

The look was almost unsettling to Dan, and his breath caught in his throat, coming out as a choked out grunt of confused arousal that Phil couldn’t have missed if he’d tried. Slowly, Phil’s smirk widened.

“I hadn’t really expected to find that you… _did_.”

Slowly, Phil stalked forward, eyes roaming over Dan’s body as if he hadn’t ever seen it before. Rather suddenly, Dan was incredibly embarassed and self aware, unsure how he must look sprawled out like this. Surely, his hair was a mess, all bunched up under his head. He could feel that his shirt had ridden up in a horribly messy way that couldn’t be in the last bit attractive, and his jeans had never quite fit right at the waist, despite being so tight Dan sometimes wondered how no one could see his dick outlined along the inseam.

But Phil was looking at Dan like he was a buffet that had been put on display for him.

“Dan?” Phil asked, snatching Dan’s attention back to his face once again. “Why were you really staring at my junk?” he asked, his voice knowing.

“I - I -” Dan tried, but found that his throat had gone dry and he couldn’t get any words out. His dick had gone rock hard in his jeans, and he could feel the searing _need_ for pleasure coursing through him. Unfortunately for Dan, he wasn’t entirely sure how long he was going to last once someone got their hands on him - especially if that person was _Phil_. He swallowed, and licked his lips, but he couldn’t seem to push any more words out from between his lips.

Phil stepped in closer still, until he was finally stood at the end of the L shaped sofa with his knees pressing to the edge, and Dan’s legs on either side of him. He was full on smirking now, but he didn’t lean down.

“Do you like me, Dan?” Phil asked, the daring dominatrix Dan had come to know from his porn blog.

 _Holy hell_ , Dan thought, and nearly came in his pants right then and there. Instead, he pinched his eyes closed and tried to get his breathing back under control, tried to reign in the pulsing of his cock against the confines of his jean, the urge to rock his hips up into the air and _plead_ -

“Do you, Dan?” Phil asked again. The barest of light touches skimmed up Dan’s thigh, and his eyes snapped open to find that Phil’s fingers were hovering lightly just over the stiff set of Dan’s jeans. His eyes were piercing, and all black now, as he waited for Dan to say something.

Breathless, terrified, and not entirely sure of himself, Dan managed to sputter out a whimpery, “Yes.”

The smirk on Phil’s face managed to morph itself into something of a sincere smile, and then, without warning, Phil was leaning over Dan’s body, finally, _thankfully_ , touching Dan’s thighs and stroking his fingers up over the covered skin. Dan let out an embarrassing, guttural moan and listened as Phil laughed in response, this time the sound that husky drawl Dan had become far too familiar with over the last few days.

“Good,” Phil finally replied, hefting himself onto the sofa with Dan, and sliding one leg up between Dan’s spread ones. His hands shifted from where they’d moved to caress Dan’s thighs, and bracketed Dan’s head instead, so that Phil could hold himself up over his body. Shamefully, Dan’s hips jerked up off of the sofa and found delicious contact with Phil’s, before he let out yet another embarrassing moan. Again, Phil laughed, leaning in so the sound puffed across Dan’s lips.

Dark hair fanned out between their faces, and Dan opened eyes he hadn’t even realized he’d closed to stare up into dark, blue eyes, whose pupils were far too dilated. Breathless, Dan stared up at Phil, amazed that this was happening.

“Is this a dream?” he found himself asking, cheeks flushed and mind so hazy he didn’t even have it himself to be embarrassed.

The smirk wormed its way back onto Phil’s face, and he shook his head devilishly.

“No, Dan. This is _definitely_ , not a dream.” Without warning, Phil pressed in close, and mercifully kissed Dan.

His mouth was unlike anything Dan had ever felt before. It was unlike anything Dan had ever actually expected, even _with_ the endless sexy promises Phil made in his online persona. Dan had known that Phil could put on a good show, but he hadn’t quite known if Phil could _perform_ , but _fuck_ had he been wrong.

Phil’s mouth was sinful. Not only were his lips ridiculously hot, but so was his tongue, pushing into Dan’s mouth and taking over everything. Dan could feel everything; the warmth of Phil’s body hovering over top of his, the sense of Phil breathing against him, and his tongue as it found its way into every last crevice of Dan’s mouth. Phil was an adept kisser, and when he sucked on Dan’s tongue, pulled back to bite at his lip, and sucked to soothe over the injury, Dan could do nothing other than lift his hands and twine his fingers roughly through Phil’s silky black locks.

“God,” Dan whispered, when Phil finally pulled away. He didn’t go very far, merely smirking down at a perfectly dazed Dan. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this.”

Phil didn’t seem entirely too surprised. In fact, if the self-assured why he pushed his knee up between Dan’s legs and ground the appendage into Dan’s cock was any indication, he seemed perfectly confident in his ability to seduce. Dan couldn’t control the gasp and the whine that flew from his mouth at Phil’s touch, and he arched his body down into it, seeking more.

Where had the nerdy, shy Phil Dan had once known gone? Who was this boy in his arms now, caging him against the sofa cushions and making love to Dan’s body like he owned it? What had happened to the boy who’d been terrified of why Dan was staring at his junk for the last week? Where had all this confidence come from?

Dan opened his eyes, desperate to see Phil, and for the first time noticed the desperation, the fear, in Phil’s movements.

False bravado. Phil was just as unsure about all of this as Dan was, only he was far better at hiding it. Rather than letting the embarrassment shine through, Phil put on the same sexualized fantasy he put on when he was playing “amazingporn.”

Dan couldn’t take it anymore.

Before he let this go any further, Dan had to confront Phil, and make sure that both of them actually wanted this. Dan might be complete enamoured with the sexual fiend Phil portrayed on his porn blog, but he was even more enamoured with his best friend. Even if Phil had asked Dan if he liked him, Dan thought it was important they worked this part of their feelings out first, before they did anything… more.

WIth every last ounce of will in Dan’s body, he shoved Phil away from him, and scrambled backwards on the sofa cushions so that he could fold his body up and hide his erection away. The movement jostled the sensitive part of his body, and Dan found himself groaning unintentionally.

Phil, for his part, moved away easily. He almost jerked back from Dan at the push, and climbed off of the sofa without complaint, eyes wide and the smirk completely gone from his face. He suddenly looked beyond nervous, and more than a little bit ashamed. Dan felt suddenly horrible, but his mouth was still dry, so he couldn’t seem to get any words past his lips to reassure Phil that this was _okay_.

“I’m sorry,” Phil apologized immediately, shoving a hand through his fringe to push his hair back. He suddenly looked beyond stressed, which Dan felt horrible for.

Managing to get his breathing back under control, Dan shook his head quickly.

“No, please don’t be sorry.”

“But I am, Dan. That was completely… not okay. I didn’t even ask -”

“Yes you did!” Dan disagreed on principle.

“But I didn’t!” Phil shot back. “I didn’t ask if I could touch you, or kiss you, or, or, or -”

Dan’s cheeks went pink. Phil sighed, and hung his head in shame.

“I’m sorry, Dan. Maybe you should just go.”

Instantly, Dan felt his body go stiff with rejection. There was some part of him that knew that wasn’t what was happening. Phil had just been on top of him, after all, kissing the living daylights out of him, and yet Dan couldn’t seem to prevent the way his heart panged in his chest as if Phil had taken a knife and carved it out. He flinched backwards against the sofa cushions, but shook his head resolutely anyway.

“No, Phil. I don’t want to leave,” Dan insisted. He found he couldn’t lift his eyes, however, and stared instead at his knees. He just… hadn’t wanted to push things before the two had gotten a chance to talk, that was all. Especially not when Phil had looked so… afraid. The moment Dan had realized the confidence was all just a charade, Dan had realized that he didn’t want Phil like this.

He wanted Phil, pure and open the way he was by the time he was close on video. The firm hand that stroked himself to climax, and allowed himself to share it all over the internet.

“I know about amazingporn,” Dan finally blurted out, when Phil didn’t say anything in response to him. Dan heard it as Phil inhaled sharply, clearly both surprised and horrified at the revelation, and finally, Dan looked up. “I - I found it on accident, on your phone,” he admitted, because if the two of them were going to be together, they might as well start out being honest with one another.

Cheeks darker than they’d been all day, Dan stared into the now terrified pair of blue eyes across from him, and sighed. Wincing at how uncomfortable his erection felt all bunched up the way it currently was, Dan finally gave in and stood up. He ached to reach down and adjust himself, to give himself some kind of relief, but Dan also didn’t want to make Phil any more uncomfortable than he already was, so instead, he merely grimaced and held himself tall and erect - excuse the pun.

“Phil,” Dan sighed, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have invaded your privacy like that, it’s just.” Dan felt his body pulse with desire at the very moment of what he’d thought when he’d first seen the blog. Pulling on his big boy pants, and deciding to face this head on the way he’d unintentionally done so for the last few minutes, Dan straightened up once again, and blurted out, “I’ve been lusting after you for years, and when I saw a blog full of your nudes, I just couldn’t help myself.”

Dan watched as Phil’s eyes went impossibly wider, and for the first time all day, his cheeks turned a dark, crimson red.

There was the Phil Dan knew, the one who got embarrassed easily, and couldn’t even bring himself to talk about sex. Embarrassment suited Phil, and seeing it helped bring back some of Dan’s confidence.

Stepping over to where Phil had retreated after being pushed off of the sofa, Dan opened his mouth to speak once again.

“I’ve been in love with your for ages, Phil. Seeing you like that… it made me want to do things to you even more than I ever had before. I - I felt cheated, that so many thousands of people had gotten to see you like that before me, but it was a blessing and a curse, because… I couldn’t look at you the same way after seeing the way you captioned the videos, after hearing the sounds you make when you -” Dan couldn’t continue, moaning softly just at the memory of how Phil sounded.

His mouth fell open as his cock pulsed in his pants. He could feel that he was already close to orgasm as it was, but he held himself back as best as he could, biting the inside of his cheek in an attempt to keep himself under control. Groaning as that only seemed to make the arousal worse, Dan’s eyes snapped back open, and he stared up at Phil with lust blown eyes.

“I want - I want _that_ Phil, sure, but not if - not if that Phil isn’t sure of himself. I pushed you away because I needed to know -”

“God, Dan,” Phil said, cutting his best friend off. His eyes were closed, and Dan could very clearly see the outline of Phil’s cock pressing against his jeans, now. The tip was leaking, desperate already, and Dan found himself groaning all over again at the sight. “Fuck, please,” Phil whispered. “Just… just get over here already.”

Dan didn’t need to be told twice. In three, bold strides, Dan shoved himself into Phil’s personal space, and pressed their mouths desperately together.

Phil worked him like a pro. His hands came up to grip tight at Dan’s hips, and his lips tore at Dan’s mouth, exposing him in every delicious way possible. He made Dan feel things he hadn’t known he could ever feel, and the kiss made its way straight to his dick.

“I’ve wanted you -” Phil gasped, “- for so long.”

Dan hummed against Phil’s lips, and kissed him again.

“You’re -” Phil continued, between kisses, “-the one I think about when -” Phil grunted, “-I film those videos, take those photos, get myself off.”

Dan couldn’t help it. He found himself instantly thrusting his hips up against Phil’s hips, begging for more, and hissing at the feel of jean zipper against jean zipper. The pain was sharp, but so fucking good, and Dan wanted _more_.

He was teetering right on the edge, now that he was so close to everything he had ever wanted.

“I love you, too,” Phil murmured, and took Dan’s mouth in such a searing kiss that Dan couldn’t hold it at bay any longer. His orgasm rushed through him, setting his veins on fire as pleasure coursed through him. It was like a ball of string unraveling in his gut, punching through his balls, and hotwiring his brain all at once. Dan let out a wild keen he hadn’t known he could make, and slumped into Phil as he rutted painfully against him.

Phil didn’t make him stop. Instead, Phil held Dan tighter and grunted into Dan’s mouth, kissing him harder and wetter still until Dan had managed to work himself through the aftershocks enough to collapse into Phil’s body.

For a long moment, they just stood there, Dan in Phil’s arms, and Phil’s hands bound around his waist.

It was almost everything that Dan had ever dreamed of. He could feel himself smiling against Phil’s shoulder, could feel his heartbeat racing out of his chest, his chest heaving, as Phil shuddered against him and placed teasing kisses along the edge of his neck. He didn’t seem quite aware of the action, but Dan was, and it helped to bring him along just that little bit more as he realized that Phil still had a quite large problem of his own.

At the very thought of it, at the thought of the wet spot on Phil’s jeans, Dan groaned.

“Please, Dan,” Phil whispered.

Moaning with longing, Dan dropped down to his knees, and didn’t hesitate to get Phil’s jeans undone.

Phil’s legs were shaking. He was taking deep, shuddering breaths above Dan, the sounds reminiscent of the videos Dan had seen, and his voice had gone all husky and deep again. It was endlessly arousing, and Dan could almost feel his cock coming to attention again, but he was too weak to do anything about it. Instead, he pressed his mouth along the wet cotton of Phil’s boxer shorts, and sucked at the tip of the cock Dan was far too familiar with for having never seen it up close before.

Phil made one of those patented grunting noises again, bucking his hips, and Dan took mercy on him. Phil’s hands were gripping tight to his hair, a sensation Dan hadn’t registered until just that second, but he didn’t even care. He was too busy trying to unwrap the present before him, and he nearly came all over again when he managed to uncover Phil’s glorious cock, up close and personal.

Dan was salivating, and he knew it. His eyes were wide, mouth open, and he was panting as he took in what he was about to shove into his mouth.

Phil’s fingers tugged at Dan’s hair. Dan looked up, only to find Phil looking at him with such heat in his eyes that Dan couldn’t bear to make him wait any longer. Taking in a long, deep breathe filled with desperate desire, Dan took Phil’s cock into his mouth, and moaned.

He tasted like salt, and sweat, and husky musk. The feel was like wonderful silk as it ran along Dan’s tongue, and the feel of precum made Dan’s heart skyrocket into his chest. Phil's hands were gripping tighter to his hair now, and Dan was lost in an entirely new kind of pleasure as he sucked around the thick girth in his mouth, taking every last inch that he could and covering the rest with his hand.

He could feel that vein he was so familiar with under both his tongue and his hand as he lapped and stroked over Phil’s thick flesh, fisting him and sucking him as much as he could, desperate to make Phil come. Phil’s hips pumped against his face, but it was clear he was doing everything he could to hold himself back, for which Dan was grateful.

For all of the videos Dan had seen, he had no idea how to do this, and he doubted he’d be able to take all of Phil’s cock down his throat.

As it was, that didn’t seem to be necessary. As Dan finally seemed to get the hang of things, bobbing his head in a rhythm he was hoping was fast enough for Dan, Phil quite suddenly came, letting out a low, throat groan above him as he hips shook and his cock shuddered on Dan’s tongue. Thick globs of cum shot into Dan’s mouth, and he swallowed on instinct, blanching and pulling off of Phil far too early as the taste hit him.

Come streaked Dan’s face from the movement, but Dan didn’t care, so long as the thick semen wasn’t in his mouth. Phil shuddered above him, and then collapsed, boneless, on the floor next to Dan.

He muttered out a quick, “Sorry,” before he seemed to lose himself completely in his orgasm.

Wiping at his mouth, Dan couldn’t say that he completely minded. Considering he’d made Phil come without the ability to warn Dan, Dan felt pretty accomplished, and he stood as Phil collected himself to go and grab some paper towels.

The movement made Dan suddenly aware of his own wet pants, and he grimaced at the feeling of cum solidifying against his thighs. He was going to need to change, and soon, or else this was going to feel really disgusting back home. Besides, Dan didn’t need his mum seeing the wet spot on his jeans.

Returning to Phil’s side, Dan collapsed back onto the floor, and handed the wad of napkins to Phil to clean up. Keeping one for himself, Dan swiped at his face, a bit grossed out at the feeling of cum all over him, and did his best to clean himself up.

“That…” Phil managed to groan out, “Was amazing.”

Laughing, Dan shook his head, but couldn’t help but agree.

“Yeah. It really was. So much for putting on a show for your fans, amazing _porn_ ,” Dan teased, becaues he felt that he could now, and laid down on the floor next to Phil.

Phil groaned, but rolled over to face Dan, pants still undone and dick laying soft against his thigh. His eyes were softer than they’d been all day, and he looked… enamoured.

Dan felt his breathing catch.

“Perhaps it’s time I shut down that blog…” Phil murmured, reaching out to stroke his fingers along Dan’s cheek. Dan felt his heart thump hard in his chest at the promise that suggestion gave, and shrugged his shoulders, snuggling in close to Phil.

They would need to get up soon, before Phil’s family returned. The living room really hadn’t been the best place to lose each others virginity.

“If that means what I think it does, that sounds good,” Dan replied, “But only if I get a few private images of my own. I’ll pay extra for the hot captions,” Dan continued, and laughed when Phil reached up to hit him on top of the head.


End file.
